MAYBE YOU ALREADY KNOW THIS

I have determined that my technique is superior to all other techniques that may exist, even though I don't know what they could possibly be. I refer here to my method for sticking bars of soap together. I do this when the one in my shower gets a little puny -- I stick it to a fresh new one. You do this too, right? Or am I crazy? I might be crazy.

ANYWAY

1. Use a tool of some sort to score a series of deep, cross-hatched lines into one surface of the new bar. You want the lines to be somewhere around 2mm or 1/16" deep.
2. Do the same with the old bar.
3. Get both bars wet.
4. Stick the two bars together, with the scored surfaces touching.
5. Squeeze as much as is reasonable; you don't want to destroy the old bar entirely. Just make the two bars be firm friends.
6. You may want to leave them on the soap dish with the new bar on top.

This is more or less the same technique I remember using to "weld" pieces of clay together back during my ceramics class in high school. It works pretty well, is all I'm sayin'.

This has been a public service announcement that may not have been necessary.