ORBITAL TOY SATELLITE: FIRE

Child's Play is in gear again this year, people. This means it is completely feasible to such as skip out on your morning nonfat moccacino latte two days in a row and send a sick kid a toy instead. I don't even drink coffee and I managed to do this.

I'm not saying this to feel smug or anything; I'm already a TV star, so I automatically know I'm just intrinsically better than 99% of the population.